in the words of ferris bueller...

"Life moves

pretty fast; if you don't stop and look around every once in a while, you could miss it."

I have been pretty awful at keeping up with this blog that I had such high hopes for. But I suppose where there are high aspirations, there is a high chance of failure. So I am trying again. I am working at the MIT AgeLab this summer. It is incredible. I am blessed with this opportunity, I am blessed by the work I am doing, I am blessed by the people I am meeting and most of all I am blessed because I am being allowed to dream and scheme and have hope for what things might come my way as I progress on my course.

Tonight, I was waiting at the bus stop, like I do, the good old CT2 Ruggles Station. And I realized that I had my camera in my bag of journal articles, Harry Potter & the Metro. Everyday, I see these beautiful orange and yellow flags that line the median of the Kendall Square/MIT bus/subway stop. It is so serene to watch these flags welcome me to work every morning and wave me off as I leave for home as the sun sets. And then I arrived home to find one of the daily quotes in my inbox to read the words of Ferris Bueller. And I realized, that I had actually done that today and so I hope to continue many more days, if not all of them, to share with you what I am stopping to see along the way before I miss it, or worse, before I leave it behind because something comes to an end.

I wish you a quiet moment to stop and see the things that may otherwise quickly pass you by. Whether that be tonight or tomorrow, I hope that moments finds you and brings you the sense of peace I felt seeing those flags tonight in Cambridge, MA.

Faith

The Way I See It #58

I have faith.  Faith in our wondrous capacity for hope and good, love and trust, healing and forgiveness.  Faith in the blessing of our infinite ability to wonder, question, pray, feel, think and learn.  I have faith.  Faith in the infinite possibilities of the human spirit.

-James Brown

Emmy-wining sportscaster and co-host of FOX NFL Sunday

What I take away from these words:

1) I spend TOO much time at Starbucks and need to hit up Espresso Royale (the local coffee shop) more often for my lattes and teas

2) Wise words to remember everyday I wake up.  So far it seems to be working and I find that I'm able to go through my days with a great sense of peace.

winter air, night sky

wood burnt stove star sky

swift walk, wool coat, foggy breath

strung lights cling to roofs

-e.kalfas

(a little haiku that came to my head as i walked to the t stop tonight.  after a night of biostatistics, i found that looking up at the night sky was the quickest way to clear my head.  and i couldn't get away from the intoxicating aroma of wood burning in the air in this quaint new england neighborhood.  it reminded me of why i loved this part of the country.)

a simple "hello"

The Way I See It #141 

(courtesy of my granda soy latte cup from starbucks on Comm. Ave.)

I used to feel so alone in the city.

All those gazillions of people and then me, on the outside.

Because how do you meet a new person?

I was very stumped by this for many years.

And then I realized, you just say, "Hi."

They may ignore you.

Or you may marry them.

And that possibility is worth that one word.

--Augusten Burroughs

Author of Running with Scissors.

It's so perfect at how the universe works.  How something simple like a coffee cup's printing can actually serve as a tool for reflection.  As I was walking back from a Buddhist Community Meeting, with my friend and fellow RA--Kat, I popped into Starbucks to get something to warm myself on this 21 degree day.  And in sitting here, in the Res Hall dining hall, preparing for a group assignment with my social welfare policy group, I stopped to read what the quote on my coffee cup said.  And it struck me how ironic it was that on this day, Kat and I walked into a community center where a Buddhist meeting was happening, a place with perfect strangers...and how powerful the word "Hello" can be.

As we settled in to chant with the community around us, people immediately came up to us--to welcome us and help warm us--people were coming up to us saying "Hi", "Hello", "Welcome", "Do you need help finding a seat", "Here is what's happening right now".  It was such a wonderful thing on this otherwise frigid day.

And it's true.  Saying hello can have such an impact, a ripple effect.  I've always tried to say hello when I'm standing next to someone in line, on an elevator, on the T, in the hallway.  Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.  Sometimes it ends up with a rather unpleasant response from the receiver of my greeting...but the starbucks reflection makes a good point.  It's worth that simple word.  It's genuinely worth it.

Until next time, I wish you many "hellos" from people who fill your days.

Quote of the Day:

"Do what you can, with what you have, where you are."

-Theodore Roosevelt

a momentous time

Adam Zyglis, Editorial Cartoonist, Buffalo News

(www.adamzyglis.com)

HOPE is beautiful

I sat in the BU Student Union today, with perfect strangers and wonderful friends and watched the swearing in of the 44th President of the United States.  I listened to the call to action, I listened to the cheering in the room around me, the prayers and benedictions offered up.  Obama's speech writer is 26 or 27 years old, maybe that's why I connected to the words of this dynamic politician?  

Or maybe, I connected with his words and his mission is because I am already there, along with my classmates, starting the long journey to attempt at making a difference of some kind in this world.  As my Social Welfare Policy professor reminded us today, we felt inspired even before Obama became President and now (she said) we might feel like our mission and work has more support than ever...because we finally have a community organizer in the highest office this country has.  A man who so intimately understands the long process that change is, the struggles of getting people to come together and the greater struggle of keeping people focused on a common goal.

It's funny, how people around me were so angry with the election of Obama.  People asked if I was really happy with my decision and that they hoped I was happy with my choice.  That they hoped anyone who voted for Obama was happy with their choice.  YES I AM.  And even in 6 months or 2 years, when Obama's honeymoon has worn off, I will still say "YES.  I am happy with my choice."  I made my choice because this man could rally people behind him and isn't that what this democracy is supposed to be about?  We do not live in a monarchy, where a King or Queen rules.  We live in a country, that although not perfect, is a democracy.  I voted for a man who I knew would support the ideals that I want this country to stand for.  I voted for a man who embodies the ideals that drew me to the field of social work.  I voted for someone who was able to re-energize a country that needed to be reminded of what it means to have freedom.

So yes, I am proud to say that I will never regret my vote.  Because it is NOT Obama's job.  It is OUR job to make change, the job of the citizens of this country.  If we do not risk standing up for what we believe and for what matters to us so that change will occur, then there is nothing Obama can do for us.  When did it become okay to pass responsibility on to the next person and stop taking responsibility for our own citizenship, for our own well-being, for our neighbors, co-workers and country.  Even the movie "Wall-E", an animated Disney movie, shows the laziness that exists within our culture and it is unfortunate when a light-hearted Disney movie takes on such a political undertone.

Turn off the television.  Pick up a book, a history book for that matter.  Read about the men and women who have come before and the challenges they faced and conquered.  This country is where it is because of all of us.  The smallest crisis can have a ripple effect that is unimaginable.  But that ripple can be positive or negative, it's all up to what we choose to do about it.  The time has come where we are being called to take responsibility as citizens of this country that has already accomplished so much.  We cannot let the sacrifices of those who have gone before us to fall to the wayside, Obama was elected because people wanted a change.  People wanted to feel inspired.  People wanted someone who would emulate the dreams we are all working to achieve, each different, each unique, each important.

Today is a day I will remember forever.  In the way my parents remember the assassination of Kennedy, of MLK.  The way I remember 9/11.  I sat in the Student Union and cried today because just a few decades ago, this moment would not have been possible.  And here, in my lifetime, I am witnessing history in the making.  I am part of this history and it is overwhelming.  Margaret Meade was indeed correct when she said, "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful people can change the world.  Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has."

This was a proud day for social workers.  A proud day for the world.  A proud day for America.

Peace and love on this historic day.

Quote of the Day:

"Rosa sat so Martin could stand.  Martin stood so Barack could run.  Barack ran so our children could fly."

the slacker returns...

if you're reading this, i know you might be wondering where on earth i've been?  i often ask myself a similar question at the end of the day: "what did you do with yourself today kalfas?"  my life is a blur of activity and yet i find that i am able to absorb details around me, somehow i am managing to stop and smell the coffee (not really drink it) and still accomplish 80% of my daily to-do list.

anyway...this really isn't about my ability to multi-task because obviously i haven't done it all that well if i've neglected updating the blog i promised i would be updating.

the new semester at BU is upon me and i'm thrilled!  i love the school, the city, the friends i've been making, the adventure of learning the ins and outs of a new place (yes, it is still new after 4 months).  at this point i may even stay in Boston for my PhD...who knows?  i arrived back to boston on january 5th (around 1am) and started back at my field placement internship the same day...9 hours later.  but let me take you on a little trip back in time before i got on the plane to head back to boston...

...i spent some amazing days in buffalo reliving my former life, an amazingly, wonderful chapter that is still propped open a wee bit waiting to see if i will indeed end up back in Buffalo working for Buffalo ReUs

e.  maybe michael's (a co-op friend) prediction will come true and he'll be hiring me to work for him in a few years.  it's an amazing organization that everyone should know about too.

as Jessica or Adam or Brian were shuffling me around town like my middle school days, i began to feel homesick for buffalo.  i never expected it, but being back in the safety of that place, this city that had been my home for 10 years, i wanted to be back.  walking into the lexington co-op, where i had cashed people out for almost 3 years, i was radiating with joy to be back in that space seeing familiar faces, walking amongst the shelves that make up a store that is so much more than just a store to me.

(a side note here for those who may not know...jessica is the sister that the almighty overseer of the universe never gave me by blood, thankfully we met move-in day at canisius in august 1998.  she can have a conversation with me in a voicemail because she already knows what i would say and how i would say it.  she is forever part of my heart.  jessica is married to adam, one of the most incredible men i have ever met in my life and also a fabulous friend.  not to mention a killer editorial cartoonist for the buffalo news.  adam and jess are fierce friends with my dear brother and me and we are all the better for them.  brian is my partner in crime, he is stanford to my carrie (sex and the city), will to my grace (retired nbc sitcom), my platonic boyfriend, my gin and tonic happy hour or any hour, deep-thoughts comrade.)

it was in this visit home where i met olive, the cutest french bulldog you could ever imagine meeting.  i had the chance to visit my old neighbors on livingston street and give them the nepal peace flags i had been promising since before i left in august 2008.  that's marcia to the left, standing under the peace flags that her and christine (photographer) hung up outside the best little apartment building you could ever dream of living in!  i miss my space there so much, it was so homey and wonderful.  *sigh*  but the space is still great and we were able to gather marcia, randy, brandon, christine, chris, brian and myself...nate and ryan were there in spirit too.  it reminded me of our first potluck way back when i moved in a few years back.  and seeing these glowing faces made me so happy that i have been blessed with the gifts of wonderful friends.  i surely miss those gatherings of our urban family, but i am building an addition to that family up here in boston.

so i did all the typical things while in buffalo, ate at the old favorite places (Betty's, Lex Co-op, the shops of Elmwood Ave.), visited some favorite bars (Allentown Hardware) and had the time to be grateful for how good Buffalo was and still is to me.  leaving was sad, but i know that good things are coming in the months that lay ahead of me here in boston.

now that i am back and settled in, for the most part, my residents are filtering back to the floor and my planner is filing up with classes, homework, events for my residents, events for me, yoga classes, trips home, alternative spring break and the list goes on.  classes have begun.  i enjoy all of them, especially my biostatistics class because it is helping to connect me to the school of public health.  my research in the institute for geriatric social work is starting up again and i am on the path to getting a research assistant position there for the 2009-2010 academic year.

today is an incredibly cold day, the type of day where it is best to wear warm fleece clothes and watch movies while eating popcorn and drinking hot cocoa.  which is what i am off to do right now.  Manhattan.  A Woody Allen movie that Jessica and Adam have been encouraging me to watch since the summer maybe?  Yay netflix!

until next time, stay warm and remember the real reason we have a holiday on monday...MLK Jr. (an alum of BU actually) and the values he stood for.  it is rather ironic that the inauguration of our new president is happening on the heels of this holiday.  and i ask that if you are not happy with the president elect, to set aside any cynicism and negativity and try to be hopeful, try to believe in someone who wants to bring good things to our country.  and if you have any questions as to why he chose to take on this task...just read the letter he wrote to his daughters.  his perspective is wise and honest and flawed because he will never accomplish all he hopes for, but so what?  what president has?  his task is daunting and his dreams are many, but is it really valid to fault a person because they have hope?  i would like to think there are worse characteristics a person could have, worse things a person could believe in when we live in a world where people are so quick to see the glass half-empty...maybe a good new year's resolution would be to try and see what the glass is life half-ful instead?

social workers can be community organizers.  obama's first job was as a community organizer.  people have even referred to jesus as a community organizer.  even MLK was a community organizer, but it shouldn't take their life ending at the people who hate them, for the mission of the work to be respected and honored.

and in the end...if people are left uncomfortable because of this new president, good.  it's good to be a little uncomfortable, a little uneasy, a little irritated because it means that you are tuned in and hopefully for the right reasons.  change does that and change was needed here.  and if you have a better idea about what the president should be doing then heed the words of Ghandi and be the change you wish to see in the world.  it all starts in the mirror.

Quote of the day:

"Change, however, does not occur magically.  It represents individual and collective pioneering efforts.  You can still choose to be a pioneer?  And I hope you will do so."

-Stephen Breyer

revisiting resolutions

it amazes me how a number like 2009 can elicit such an energy in people...energy to change, to resolve to do better or start or stop or at least pause to notice the world happening around them.  what an ingenious idea.  with the flip of a calendar year, we resolve to make changes in and for ourselves.  and so what if we can really make the changes whenever we want, regardless of a brightly lit ball dropping in times square.  there is something almost romantic about saying that we are going to wipe the slate clean and start over with a new year...it is such an inspiring time, so full of hope of what is unknown and yet to come.  

i suppose for me, i try to see most days as a chance for change.  an opportunity to reflect on the previous day and think about what i need or want to change.  deep thoughts like this can easily leave anyone's head spinning, i surely feel that way most days.

and so here i sit, pondering, remembering, contemplating.  in my best friend's house as her sweet little 10 week old puppy is asleep under the kitchen counter/breakfast bar.  it's easy to think in quiet, well decorated houses.  and i think about this city i left 4 months ago, about the life, people and places i left behind in an effort to make my own resolution to be happy, to seek out what i needed to be a whole person.  some people might think that i couldn't handle being a grown up and having a real job in the "real world".  but in fact, that isn't so.  i made a choice to change something that was not right for me.  and shouldn't that be a resolution for everyone...to help bring more happiness into the world?  i think so.  i think it's a marvelous idea and something that we could all aspire to.

as i was watching elmwood avenue pass me by last night, from the car window, i was seeing changes in the city i left behind.  i stopped by the little store where i worked for two and a half years and immediately felt the emotions of that wonderful place wash over me.  i miss the people and places that i have left as a result of my departure, but i have amazing opportunities swarming around me and only because of the people and places in my past and the love and support and challenges they have given me.

i cannot say that i have a list of resolutions for myself that are any different than what i think about on a daily basis.  i have my ever-growing to do list of tasks as well as personal goals i need to work towards.  but i think that regina brett, a columnist for the cleveland plain dealer newspaper summed it up best at the end of her most recent new year's column:

"Welcome 2009 with open arms, every single morning it arrives, all 365 days of the year."

and that's my goal as I prepare to leave my winter break behind, as well as the city that i called home for 10 lovely years.  the most i can do is keep my prayer basket close, write in my gratitude journal and say thank you for each day as it arrives with the opportunity for me to do what i can in that day and then move forward to the next with the previous days' lessons to guide me.

cheers to a new year full of new hopes and dreams and happiness!

Quotes of the Day:

"Some people, no matter how old they get, never lose their beauty—they merely move it from their faces into their hearts." -Martin Buxbaum

"To exist is to change, to change is to mature, to mature is to go on creating oneself endlessly." -Henri Bergson